So, where did my journey for mental health recovery start?
Sadly, my mental health had to deteriorate first, and this began in late 2018 I suppose, continuing through 2019. During May 2019 I visited my GP for help as I was struggling with isolation, loneliness, finding it difficult to maintain a façade of normality each day for those around me and having about one hour of sleep each night. Diagnosed with stress related depression/anxiety, I was offered medication, although this had the interesting and frightening side effect of causing lucid dreams. As a big fan of the TV series, The Walking Dead, this became quite unnerving!
During December 2019, my medication was changed because of the side effects. Thankfully being an extra each night in The Walking Dead stopped too!
At Christmas 2019, I completely broke down, muddled my way through Christmas putting the bravest face on for my family. In early January 2020 I was signed off work and spent almost a whole month in my lounge, bingeing tv series with the blinds closed and feelings of shame, guilt and embarrassment regarding my mental health for company. I felt that “as a man I should be able to cope” and that I HAD FAILED!
Thankfully, I had spoken with a friend who had attended an earlier cohort and he spoke highly of the Head 4 Health programme. He gave me the contact details for Rachel Smith, health and wellbeing manager. I contacted Rachel, who was so supportive and understanding, and was awarded a place on the cohort commencing in late February 2020.
This simple act gave me the strength and courage to inform close family and friends of my mental health struggles, and most were so supportive, but I did have one “man up” comment made to me and I was so surprised how much that comment distressed me!
Fast forward to Tuesday 25th February 2020, my first session of the Head 4 Health Programme at the Molineux.
I was nervous for a couple of reasons; one was meeting new people and the fear of the unknown but my friend who had attended a previous cohort had allayed many of my fears. The other reason is that I am a West Bromwich Albion supporter!
So, arriving early at Molineux, sitting in reception on my own and wearing a Baggies shirt underneath my coat, I began the wait! I was experiencing nervous excitement and when another member showed up and sat next to me, I started chatting with him and that calmed my nerves. Thus, began cohort 8 of the Head 4 Health programme and the first session of our twice weekly sessions for six weeks.
The first session was like a poker game, all attendees were nervous, but we shared our stories and began having the craic especially with me being a Baggies fan. The sessions are two hours long, the first hour is discussion based and the second hour is a physical activity. So, informative and fun, but be wary of falling over on the artificial grass during kwik cricket as it hurts and burns your skin!! We were all too competitive!
Sadly, Covid-19 measures ended our face-to-face sessions after the completion of week three of the planned six weeks. Our sessions became online zoom meetings and indispensable during lockdown. The Wolves Foundation staff worked tirelessly to devise sessions with guest speakers, both practical and inspirational.
As lockdown eased, weekly “walk and talk” sessions were offered at West Park to all cohort members and have been well attended, allowing me to meet other course attendees. I think the sessions are great as the craic between attendees is fantastic. Especially when Kurran attended and, as we are both West Brom fans, we got some stick. But we may have given some back!
We made a music video in support of Mental Health Awareness Week 2021, recording at Newhampton Arts Centre recording studio, with filming predominantly around West Park during walk and talk sessions.
Extra time sessions on a Wednesday evening have begun again, held at Molineux and allow us to meet up and discuss/share various issues that we may be experiencing.
If you are thinking about joining the Head 4 Health Programme, do it!
The support I have received has been fantastic. I have made many new friends who have experienced a similar journey to myself and therefore understand how I may be feeling. I do not wish to rely upon medication to assist my mental health recovery, I prefer strategies and coping mechanisms together with the support of my Head 4 Health family on my journey to recovery.
Thanks for reading and remember:
If you don’t tell anyone, no-one knows. And if no-one knows, no-one can help.
So please, don’t suffer in silence. Support is out there. You are not alone!
Fletch
